Woman says her husband wanted to father another woman’s child — and then the update confirmed the part Reddit already suspected
A Reddit user said the marriage cracked open over a dinner conversation that sounded surreal even before the worst part came out. In the original post, the 26-year-old woman wrote that her 30-year-old husband told her a longtime female friend had asked him to be the father of her child, that he felt “flattered,” and that he wanted to do it. The wife said the woman was not just some abstract friend from far away. Her husband had dated and slept with her in the past, which made the whole arrangement feel far more intimate and threatening than a simple donor situation.
What pushed the story from uncomfortable to devastating was his explanation for why he thought this should happen. According to the post, he told his wife he wanted to move forward partly because she had previously mentioned possible fertility issues and he did not want to miss what he saw as a chance at fatherhood. She wrote that they had not even started trying for children yet, had only talked in general terms about waiting a few years, and that hearing herself treated like a maybe-already-written-off option hit hard. She said she felt shocked, hurt, and suddenly inadequate over a problem she had never even fully confirmed with a specialist.
The husband, in her telling, acted as if this could somehow stay neatly outside their marriage. She wrote that he told her she was being selfish and insecure, insisted it was not cheating, and framed it almost like a personal side project that would not really involve her. One line from the post captured why readers reacted so strongly: she said he seemed to view it like a time-consuming hobby, while she kept trying to point out that this was not a sailboat. It was a child. Reddit commenters immediately warned that if he went through with it, he would be emotionally and financially tied to the other woman in a way that would absolutely reshape the marriage.
Then came the update, and it was brutally short. Eleven days later, the woman posted again and said Reddit had been right: her husband had been cheating. She wrote that she called the other woman behind his back, learned the truth directly, and came away from the conversation saying divorce was happening. In a later comment preserved in the BORU post, she added one more ugly detail: the other woman was not pregnant, but “not for lack of trying,” which made the whole earlier conversation about sperm donation look a lot less like a strange family-planning discussion and a lot more like a cover story for an ongoing affair.
What makes the story stick is how quickly the fake logic fell apart once the wife stopped arguing inside the framework her husband handed her. At first she was asking whether she was being unfair, insecure, or somehow too controlling about a weird request. Less than two weeks later, the real answer was sitting right there: the “offer” was never really the heart of the story. It was the excuse wrapped around a betrayal that had already started. The Reddit compilation is here.
What do you think — did the story already stop making sense the second he acted like fathering another woman’s child was somehow a private side decision, or was the cheating reveal the only thing that made the whole conversation click?
